IMAGINARY CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD

         

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Devotee – Swami, the whole of this week I have been thinking about what you said last Thursday. The more I think about it, the more wonderful it appears.

Swami – What appears to you as wonderful?

D -  This idea of being in contact with You all the time.

S -  What is so wonderful about the idea?

D - Swami, if I can remain in contact with You all the time….I mean if I can feel your love in my heart all the time…..what could be more joyful than this!

S -  Why if? Do you doubt the possibility? Do you think you can’t do so? Do you think it is too difficult a task?

D -  I have no doubt about the elevating experience it would give me, but I doubt my own ability.

S -  Why doubt yourself? That is man’s greatest enemy.

D -  Yes Swami, that is so. But I still do not know how to achieve it. To feel Your love all the time in my heart….that is a tremendous possibility. At times I feel it, but very soon lose it. I cannot hold on to it even for a few hours, and here I am expecting it to be with me without a break! I must confess my weakness, so that You can guide me.

S -  It is good you confess it, but even without your confession, I know it, for I

      am in your heart. But don’t talk of it as an achievement.

D -  Swami?  

S -  My boy, Bhakti is not an achievement, for it is not gaining anything , but losing everything. When you love me, you don’t gain me, but lose yourself in me. And when you lose yourself in me, in fact, you gain yourself, for then I manifest in you; I think in your thoughts, work in your work, live through your life. That is what you really are.

D -  Ah!......Swami, the grandness of the vision thrills me….

S -  Then let this grand vision guide you.

D -   Swami, You just now said, you are always in my heart. Then where is the

        problem? Why is this talk of Your flowing into my heart? You are already there, then how can you flow into a place you have already occupied?

S - I know I am in your heart, but do you know? Since you do not know, you have some problem in recognizing it. Therefore I am using a language you can understand.

D – Sorry Swami, I put it wrongly. I wanted to say that since You are already there in my heart, where is the need of Your coming into it? And why don’t I experience Your presence within myself?

S - Because you do not recognise my presence within yourself. Experiencing God is not a static but a dynamic experience, so I mentioned the image of flowing.

D -  Swami, you are getting more and more difficult !

S - I will make it easier for you. You keep foodstuffs in your fridge. But only when you are hungry you remember to open it. If not hungry, you keep your fridge shut, and almost forget about food-in-the-fridge.

D -  Which means, we remember you when we need you.

S - And your need for me is so limited that you do not feel the need to remember me all the time. Suppose someone has a chronic stomach ache. He may be doing a hundred things throughout the day, but he is always aware of his pain. It will be almost visible on his face. If you are waiting for an all important interview in two days for a very lucrative job, whatever you may be doing, wherever you may be going, the thought of the interview shall predominate. But I do not occupy such an important place in

       your life. You need me once in a while; so you remember me once in a while.

D - Swami, we always pray that you make only good things happen in our lives, protect us from dangers and difficulties, make everybody happy, we always succeed in all our good ventures….

S - That I stand as a watchdog to your property, your health, your position; that I continue to push you up and up until where you want to reach I do not know !

D -  Swami !

 S - There is no end to your need for me; You need me because you need so many other things that you believe I could give you without any tag in exchange for a bhajan, a little charity, a new food or dress habit, and a few pictures of mine on your walls! How cheap I am in your account!

D -  Swami, I shall be a great sinner if I think so.

S - You have strange notions about me. You want to please me by singing a song, by showing me a piece of designed thermocol, by making a speech with borrowed ideas, by showing me a O grade in exams, which I gave you, and in many other funny ways, while you remain the same! You always forget that I am sitting in your heart, and can see your motives even before you are fully aware of them.

D - Then how can we please You, Swami?

S -  My child, I am not interested in what you claim to do for me, but in you. I have come for you, to love you, to be loved by you, to take you home. I need you, not your antics. The work I give you is only a communication channel to contact you. You must need me in such a manner that I will always need you.

D - But Swami, You have no needs; You are Purnam itself, how can we make You need us?

S - Surely I don’t need you for my sake. I am complete in all aspects; I do not lack anything – so what can you give me that I don’t have? I have all powers

      at my command – so what can you do for me that they can’t? Then why do you still tell me you make so many sacrifices for me, as if I need all that you give me, or give up for me? I have come to fulfill you, therefore I shall be satisfied if, and only if, you need me because you love me.

D -Please forgive me Swami, I am not able to understand the difference between needing You for something, and needing You only.

S - I will tell you; but this is not the first time that I shall have shown you the way to light. There is nothing that I haven’t said several times to persuade you to walk on the highway to God. But you have a tendency to dismiss all that as ‘all this philosophy’! You take what pleases you, not what is good for you.

       D - Swami, I humbly confess we do not always try to understand what You say.

S - And far less willing to practise them! Most people need God only in an

       emergency. A terminal disease, a financial crisis, a bereavement, a threat – and they call upon God for help. The emergency is passed, and God is shelved! Then there are people who need God for success, whatever they take it to be; for a child, for a job, for a house, a good spouse etc.

D -  Swami, is it wrong to pray for such things?

S - May not be wrong, but it is making very limited use of God. In that case, your love and adoration increases or decrease according to whether God fulfills them, or not.

D -  Yes Swami, sometimes this happens.

S -  Then there are people who need God for enlightenment, for understanding the meaning of life. They know that even after most physical and mental needs are satisfied, one can still be denied peace, contentment, and joy, for God alone is the source of the juice of life.

D - But still that is needing God for something, isn’t so?

S - Yes it is; but that is closest to God’s heart, closest to your own nature. In that case you need God for what He would like to give you gladly. Thus your need for Him and His need for you synchronise. This man rates God as the highest need in his life; not an occasional, or alternative need, or one among many other needs. That person is very dear to God.

D -  Are there any other types, Swami? 

S -  Yes. The fourth type just loves God. Their relationship with God is not need based. They don’t need God for something. They develop such closeness with God that He would be eager to do something for them. For them God is the only reality, the rest of the world is only a shadow. They are forever in communion with God, and forever in peace, in contentment, in unspeakable joy. They are the most powerful people on earth.

D -  Most powerful, Swami! How?

S -  Because my power can flow through them freely. I can use them whatever way I want to. So I protect them, I make them achieve the impossible. They are my instruments.

       D -  How do You use them swami?

       S – Not to win kingdoms, but to establish my kingdom on earth, to bring peace,

       contentment, joy into the hearts of people. They are my invincible soldiers on earth, but sadly very few people choose to be my soldiers. Hanuman was one, Jesus another.

D -  Swami, I would like to be another.

S -  My child, how I wish you understand why you and I are here today!

                - To Continue                  
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    IMAGINARY CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD                     

                                                              2

 

Devotee – Swami, last time You were telling us about Your flowing into our hearts. We  thought about it, but could not understand the idea. We know the flowing of a river; but Your flowing into our hearts?

Swami - If you take me to be just another human body, with the mass of flesh and bones it has, maybe with some difference, you cannot understand. But if you can grasp the idea that this body is only a temporary home for me, as your body too is for you, and I am not confined in any way by the limitations of the body, maybe you are ready to experience me.

             D - Then Swami, what are You? Who are You?

S - You cannot really describe in the language you are used to who I am, or what I am. Therefore Jesus described God-experience as waters of eternal life. You can understand a river flowing, you said?

D - Yes Swami, we can understand a river ceaselessly flowing into the sea.

S - Can you imagine that I am the source of such a river that flows from me towards your heart which needs to be washed and watered?

D - Hmm……Though the idea is tough, with a little practice, we can visualise that.

S – Can you also imagine that the waters of this river is sweet, cool, refreshing, full of vitality, and can make you feel great joy if you allow it to flow into your life? This river is gentlest of friends, and does not like to force itself into your heart. All the same, it is eager to befriend you.

D - Swami, why are you talking about permitting this river to flow into us, as you say? A river doesn’t need anyone’s permission to flow; on the other hand it removes any obstacle on its way, and moves on.

S – When it seeks its own salvation, no one can stop it, but if you want to irrigate your fields by its life-giving water you must gently lead it into your fields. When your mother comes to your house, and you don’t open your door for her, will she break it open to enter?

D – No; but I don’t understand why You are talking about my mother now. You were    talking about a river, weren’t You? 

S - Yes my child, this river is like a mother who wants to fill you with love.

D - What is this river, Swami?

S - Love. Imagine a glacier. An immense block of ice melts, and a glacier is born. Is the ice block different from the glacier? Aren’t they same?

D - Yes Swami, the ice and the water are but the same stuff.

S - So also me and my love. When you touch my love, you touch me. When I look at you my love goes out of me, and seeks to enter your heart. When you think of me you attract this river of my love to fill you, irrigate your life. The waters of this river can wash anything clean; fill any vessel with vitalising joy. But you must willingly open your heart to me.

D - Swami, I still don’t understand this opening of heart to your love. We love You; isn’t it enough to be loved by You?

S -  My child, last time I explained to you what love means, didn’t I? I told you it is not just an emotion; it is feeling of oneness with the loved one. When you establish that unity, you will instinctively feel what the Beloved would want you to do, how He would feel about you. Shall I give you an example?

D -  Yes Swami. That would clarify the idea.

S -  Do you love your mother?

D -  Of course yes.

S -  Do you tell yourself since she looks after you, feeds you, fulfills your needs you must love her?

D – No Swami, it is spontaneous. I just love her.

S - Suppose she tells you not to go to a certain place, not to make friend with a certain person, or do a certain thing, and you know she would feel very hurt if you do, will you still go on with what pleases you?

D - I don’t think I would like to hurt her. But Swami, now I  remember an interesting incident that happened to me last summer at home. Our neighbour has a boy of my age. One day he called me and asked me to be my friend. I just smiled at him. The next day he called me to a nearby park. I accompanied him, and we sat close to each other in a bench. There he started telling me things which I cannot repeat to anybody. Then I remembered my mother had warned me not to be friend with that boy. I felt guilty. My mother’s sad face flashed before my eyes. I stood up, and without looking back ran away from that place until I reached home, and hugged my mother. She patted me with love and asked me why I looked so much agitated. I was really gripped by some unknown fear. But after some time I was alright. Swami, how did I see my mother’s face at that time, and why was it a sad face?

S -  This is flowing of love from one person to another.

D -  How swami?

S - Since you truly loved your mother, and had opened your heart to the continuous flow of her love to you, her face flashed before your eyes when you needed protection, and pulled you away from the wrong person. Now, if a human mother’s love could do that, imagine how much more God’s love, which is God Himself, could do for you.

D -  What can God’s love do for me?

S -  How did you feel after you returned to your mother that day?

D - Oh, I felt so much relieved, so much protected. And Swami, I felt such an assurance, I knew no one can take me away from my mother. I continued to feel great strength within me for many days. That boy wanted to meet me again, but I had learnt my lesson.

S -  You wouldn’t like to have that feeling, and in a much stronger way, all your life?

D -  Oh, Swami, that would be a great blessing indeed.

S -That happens when you open your heart to me, and let me flow into it ceaselessly. I am always around you, within you; then how can the devil tempt you, take you away into wrong path? That is the meaning of my asking you follow the Master. If you allow me to flow into you, fill you with my presence, then you shall be overflowing with joy, with strength, with contentment. With my strength, you can look straight into the devil’s eye. In fact once you feel my presence within, you will see no devil at all.
D - How to do that Swami?

S - I will tell you about that next time.

        -To Continue 

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     IMAGINARY CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD

 (These conversations were written during the early part of 2000. In my interactions with teenage students I noticed that they were a little confused about the concept of spiritualising life. It is easier to love Swami, for it is difficult to resist it. But what is spirituality in love? Love, Swami always said, is guided by discipline, and this discipline keeps upgrading the devotee’s consciousness which goes on purifying our love for Him. Therefore, in Swami’s language, devotion and discipline go together. Swami wanted to first generate this love for Him in the devotee’s heart, and then teach them the value of disciplining life. But when we connect with Him on the human level, we are so much overwhelmed by His loving presence that we sometimes fail to redirect this love to spiritualising life, and at the emotional stage of a young person it is all the more true. In these conversations, which took place in my imagination, therefore, I have tried to explore what He, as our Guide and Guru, might have to say to help us understand His Way through our love for Him.)               

    

                                                                              

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Devote - Swami, we are extremely pained to see your indifference towards us.

 Swami - But I am still blessing you on your birthdays, you still come and sit  here  in Kulwant hall, participate in bhajans. This is no indifference.

 D - But Swami, we miss Your sweet smiles, sweet words; You no more talk to us. Many of us cannot even have a proper darshan if we cannot rush back from college and school in time.

 S -  I have given you more time to study, do well in exams, please your parents, fulfil your and their dreams about your future. 

D - We always look forward to our daily pilgrimage to Your Lotus Feet, and spend an hour or two listening to Your loving and wise words. This hour sustains us through the day, and propels us to go forward.

S - I have given you an institution famous all over the world, a hostel with undisturbed environment, teachers to guide your free education, and some privileges as my students. The whole world adores you. What more do you want?

D -  Swami, though we and our parents are immensely grateful to You for all these rare gifts, without Your love and affection all this is tasteless to us.

S -   If you want love, you must give love, isn’t it? And if you ask for God’s love and affection, you must give him your highest love.

D -  We always love You most.

S -  No, you don’t. I am only one of your many loves, and most often far down the list.  

D - Swami, we are Your little erring children, forever falling down, and forever looking up for Your merciful hand to pick us up.

S - I am here to precisely do that, but I really cannot help one who does not realise that he has fallen, and needs to look up for me.

D -  Swami, shouldn’t a kind mother feed a child who is crying, and cannot feed

       himself?                                                                                                         

S -  What if the child isn’t crying, and is happy rolling in his own slime?

D - Mother should pick him up all the same, give him a gentle slap, wash him, give him fresh dress, and feed him.

S -  What else do you think I am doing?

D -  But Swami, we are crying for Your love.

S -  Do you know what loving someone means?

D -  Please tell us swami.

S - You like what he likes, dislike what he dislikes; you seek to bring happiness to him, not seek happiness from him. You have a single chair for him in your heart. You don’t ask him to play the game of musical chair.

D -  Swami, it is not quite clear what You mean. Please explain clearly.

S - You love so many things, and God has to compete with those things to remain in the game. When God appears interesting, you tell yourself, okay, it will be interesting to be with God, isn’t it?

D -  Not exactly that Swami, we need You.

S - You need me for all the gifts I can give, or you just love me because you feel love for me?

D - Hmm…. we love Swami because He is God, and love whatever He gives as well.

S - Will you still love me even if I give you no gifts?

D - Swami’s loving nature would inspire love in anyone.

S - That’s it! Then what have you got to give me? I will give you my love; I will give you gifts because that is the way of love; I will overlook all your indifference to my words; I will not notice your misdeeds and continue to protect you from all your miseries and misfortunes you yourselves have created…….and what for?

D - Now that you have put it this way…..I begin to understand Swami.

S -  And after your living a full and comfortable life, without improving yourself or the world a bit, I must ensure, you enjoy a more comfortable after life, whatever that may be ! In fact you expect me to stand as insurance for your foolish and wilful living! What do you take me to be ?

D -  The most loving mother.

S - Then have you ever thought of helping your mother in her house keeping? Though she may not be in any particular need of your help, don’t you think you can add to her joy if you keep your own room tidy, keep your things in order, and still find time to ask her what you can do for her?

D - Which means, You want us to reflect Your concern, your work, Your love in our lives?

S - Exactly. Can you really show love to someone who cannot reciprocate it at least in his heart? You must remember, boy, love is not a passing feeling, a momentary drop of tear in your eye, an evanescent emotion; it is far deeper than that. It is embedded in the soul, it is establishing oneness with the loved One.

D - Swami, this is very deep philosophy, very difficult to understand.

S - It is much more than what you fight shy of – philosophy. It is the eternal truth, which glorifies and fulfills life. If you want to fulfill life’s purpose, which is an unavoidable duty towards yourself, you can do it only one way, understanding your own truth. If you are not willing to carry out this obligation to yourself, you have no rights to ask anything of me.

D -  Swami, please forgive us. We will surely do everything to be worthy of You. Please tell us how to achieve this.

S -  Allow me to ceaselessly flow into your heart.

D -  How shall we do this, Swami ?

S -  Digest whatever I have already said, rest of it, next time.

    ---- To Continue

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